Awake and Dreaming

Take Two Minutes Would You Mind?

2009-11-10T17:16:00.000-08:00

Remembrance Day – Do People Even Get It?

I’m the one who walked aboard
Across a plank of no return
I’m the one who didn’t look back
When I felt the tears begin to burn

I’m the one who crossed the sea
To a land barren and far from home
I’m the one surrounded by men
Feeling isolated and alone

I’m the one who believed in things
Who thought changes could be made
By staying out in the pouring rain
And crossing lines once forbade

I’m the one who thought I knew
The murky difference of right or wrong
Was the flag on your uniform
And your countrymen’s song

I’m the one who didn’t know
I’d be killing little boys
Disguised as men with guns ablaze
Who should be home playing with toys

I’m the one who didn’t see
The harsh reality of what war does
The innocence that gets robbed
From a child who never was

I’m the one who had to watch
What the papers wouldn’t print
Saw that man’s mangled body
Needing far more than a splint

I’m the one who left behind
My promise of a future
By listening with one deaf ear
About a life only nightmares can conjure

I’m the one who had to hide
In a crater full of filth and death
I had to watch a man gasp and cry
And take in his final breath

I’m the one who had a love
And to whom I said goodbye
I had to wipe the tears from her cheek
And promise not to die

I’m the one didn’t know
The enemy was rushing our line
I never knew today
Would be the end of my time

I’m the one who came home
In a box wrapped in white and red
I am a soldier without a name
I didn’t deserve to come home dead

This year.

Let’s make Remembrance Day count.

For the men and women of yesterday.

Of Today.

Of the tomorrow’s centuries to come.

This is without question the most important day in Canada’s calendar. Why?

These people are willing to and have died for us.

So what, Stephanie? People die every day

Yeah, people have actually asked me that.

Why?

I’ll tell you.

Because like so many thank Jesus Christ for sacrificing himself, these are ordinary kids, women, men, sisters, brothers, husbands, wives, mothers, and fathers who readily woke each morning knowing full well it could have been their last one. For millions, it was.

They went through hell every day only to have their letters crossed out, stories gone untold, and bodies forever lost.

Really? Is one day too much to ask?

2 minutes, really. We fall silent for 120 seconds to honour them. To me, that hardly seems fitting. Of course there are some who take it seriously, but for most, my generation being the worst, they take a second to stifle a snicker while the bagpipes play, then carry on with their day.

Hell our government even is slacking. Watching the ceremony last year, the reactions, and speeches made by our country’s leaders lacked sincerity even in facial expression. Hell…we get Victoria Day off, but we only take two moments of our year for heroes. It seems terrible.

Why Should I Care So Much? (It’s not like I fought or anything)

So?

My great granddad was injured in the battle of the Somme. He was a decorated Vet. But that isn’t why. Each and every person we celebrate and thank in this is more courageous than most of us could even imagine. These people are the reason we’re here, so why the heck would you not show the most respect that you can muster? There’s no excuse.

They went through hell, and teenagers became corpses or veterans. They were my age, younger, older. Who cares? They were ours. It’s very simple. Surely you can spare

To put it into perspective (Because some people are simple, and it annoys me)

Would it kill you to wear a poppy?

Or read the paper when we lose another in Afghanistan?

If you are from where I am, would it be too much to ask you to line up on the Highway of heroes when one of our own comes home?

Go to a local cenotaph and watch the men and women march and cry. You will NOT have dry cheeks after.

Turn on your television. Instead of watching CSI, watch some of the ceremonies.

And if you can’t even bring yourself to do that, then for the love of this country, put your damn cell phone down at 11am on November 11^th, and Remember.

In peace may they rest

Lest we forget

Why they died

Take a pittance of time.

November's A Big Month, People

2009-11-03T11:35:00.000-08:00

YOYOYO

Sorry I've been AWOL since september....but I've got this thing called university goin on haha...making like a TEENSY bit crazy.

Just a bit though.

I've got midterms coming out my ears, with essays, but this is an important month so I needed to stop by and fill you in. In the next 3 days I'll have actual posts on each of these things individually. But for now this shall be an overview.

First and foremost,

Today is November the 3rd. It's 6 years ago today that my uncle lost his year and a half long battle with lung cancer. He survived without a lung for nearly a year, and fought every step of the way for his family. You tought me how to play golf, and gave me my first and only set of clubs....golfing without you around doesn't really work anymore, I hope you understand. Because of you I can fight every day, and you're with me always. I love you. I remember.

~*~

It is also the most important day on Canada's calendar in the coming days. Yes, November 11, Remembrance Day. The day the guns fell silent, and to symbolize such a day, we in turn fall silent in thanks to the men and women who not only died for us then, but who are fighting and falling for us now. It's not a day for only the lost, but for those who came home, and who we're waiting for. There will be plenty more said in the coming days about this, but for now, Remember.

~*~

Next,

It's November. November is Diabetes month. Most don't know this, but it is in fact true. It's a month of education. Because I've said it before and I'll say it a thousand times more, knowledge is the only way we can beat this. I've recently come into contact with complications, but I'm optimistic. In 2009, what other option do I have? I didn't think so. So...pick up a paper, flip to the health section and spend 3 minutes of your bus ride, waiting room time, or coffee time reading about something that kills 4 out of every 5 who get it. Yes. It's still a top killer. Just because it's treatable doesn't mean it's fixed. We've got a lifeline, we're waiting on a cure. Educate yourself.

~*~

For my friends who are reading this, you'll notice that it's basically been a year since I started this....so much has happened since then, and I figured I'd give you a month in recap. Ready? And go.

I've been doing well in my classes, and my profs are amazing. My family here in Huntington is wonderful, so so so much love. Jenn's actually my roommate now - how freaking SWEET is that? Um...remember those butterflies I mentioned a long time ago? Yeah ahah..... =3 He's a wonderful guy, and he makes me so happy. He watches Disney with me, even romcoms, makes me a part of his life, and consciously wants to be a part of mine, and if that don't beat all....he loves me. He actually does.

Home is now here in the Bury, and courtice is where I live out of a suitcase. As sad as it sounds, it makes me happy. I love it. So very much.

I got to see my best friends when I went back for reading week, and there wasn;t enough time, I love them so much it hurts to be away from them so long. But that's the thing, I know they're never going to stop loving me back, so they'll always be there with me :3

Ummm....lots of new poetry, ohboy, and photography - Mike's dad leant me his Nikon before thanksgiving, and I'm hoping to use it again on the first real snowfall...yes we've had snow already, don't faint. I love it.

Famjam night this saturday! Movies, potluck, loved ones....it doesn't get better than this.

Until tomorrow, my loves,

Stephanie

~*~

love, LoVe, LOVE, lOvE, c r a z y love.

Four Years

2009-09-29T07:07:00.000-07:00

Four years ago today my life was forever changed.

Four years ago today, my life as a child was ended.

Four years ago today, my life was ruined.

And four years ago today, my life was saved.

I say this, not to sound dramatic, or to demand attention. But merely to tell you what those first few hours of finding out you had an incurable disease felt like.

I also say this because since Type One Diabetes is TREATABLE, many forget that 4 out of every 5 die of heart disease or one of the countless other complications. Insulin's a lifeline, not a cure.

Four years ago I had no real grasp on what on earth diabetes even was. I knew it involved insulin, but was basically it, which is why I don't fault my friends and family who haven't got a clue. This is also why I've become an advocate for my disease. Yes I call it a disease. Not a 'condition', not a 'state', and it sure as hell isn't an 'illness'. Prettying it up doesn't do anything but make the person who doesn't have it feel better or less awkward, and only serves to make the diabetic more of an outcast because they can't call it like it is for fear of offending someone.

I think the whole idea should be to embrace it. It's NOT a bad thing. It's a different way of survival, but not by that much. I've met hundreds of Diabetics over the last four years through forums I've started and talks and such, and I can confidently say that we're normal human beings ^_^. And I, for one, am proud to carry my pen with me, because it ties me to generations of work, spirit, strength and hope that has carried other diabetics and will continue to do so until a cure is found.

It's been four years, just over 9,000 shots of insulin, 15,000 pin pricks and 36 doctors appointments. Here I am. I'm a poet, a singer, a sister, a best friend, a daughter, a student, a girl, a diabetic. It's a part of me the same as anything else. And the pain is there, absolutely. But I have friends and family who are there ready to help me keep the pieces together. So that part of me that sets me apart from most, is the part that I cherish just as much, because without it, I wouln't be here, and I wouldn't be me.

Here's to everyone who made me live. I love you. Always.

This Is How We Roll

2009-09-17T21:32:00.000-07:00

So we're sitting around one night, and we were like "ok guys, well I gotta go cook dinner" "yeah same.." "me too..."

Then we all proved why we're university students....."Why don't we all make a party out of it?!"

DONE DEAL!!

Ladies and Gentlemen....start your elements and microwaves!

This is us. The family. We're the core part of all our lives right now. There for each other whenever, ready for any disaster - culinary or otherwise

COOKING FACEOFF

Yeah I'm cool (also sick as hell)

Ken...please put down that raw chicken, dinner'll be ready in 10 minutes

Annnnnnnnnnnnnd this is us more...naturally

Sunny, Myself, Kelly, and Kevin :)

I would be holding an insulin pen

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

tHE BIRTHDAY BOYS <3

Anyways, tomorrow we're heading downtown, then out for a birthday dinner like no other, then it's time for a killer saturday!

The Climb

2009-09-14T09:26:00.000-07:00

This is a very quick post, I'm about to meet someone to go to comp sci, but before I do

I just wanted to say two things.

One; people are truly amazing. I mean I've been an optimist all my life, but with that are the constant diasapoointments and things of being let down - god knows it happens to me all the time - but I've still always tried to give people the benefit of the doubt, and it DOES pull off. I mean, for every 5 people who let you down, there's one who proves you right, which more than makes up for it. And I just wanted to say that.

Second.
My heart doesn't have a constant hurt anymore. I just wanted to say that.

Sudbury Life Week One

2009-09-12T12:20:00.000-07:00

Howdy!

So I've officially lived in Sudbury for a week :O

Annnnnnd I love it more and more every day :)

I've had classes, gone out, stayed in, danced, made food, gone to the city, gone to the beach, all with people who I'm becoming closer and closer with every day <3 it's fantastic.

It's awesome because we don't lock our doors in Huntington, and mine is always open while I'm awake.

I'm going to get a Hermit crab with Ken and Maryse tomorrow!! :) Ken has 2 and I can't wait to get one, ugh they are ADORABLE

I got a mug with our national anthem on it!!!! <3 LOVE LOVE in both languages too :D

lmfao Yeah we're cool!

Legit Gangstahs right there hahahaha

sooooo beautiful!

don't know what's goin on here, but yeah

he THINKS he's cool

loooove

after shopping! waiting for the bus!

sucessful shopping day!!

Kelly ADORES this store

the Hypnotist last night ....bahahahahaha

My view on a perfect day

Ready for class! (actually, not really, I was almost late that morning hahahahahahaha)

Hope you're all well! More to come!

Peace, Love, Music

A Tour

2009-09-11T06:16:00.000-07:00

The following is a tour made by me for everyone I care about to watch, its a tour of my journey here, and some other random fun haha, enjoy <3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qz4OAoc8u9Q

My New Little World

2009-09-07T10:14:00.000-07:00

HULLO FROM SUDBURY!

can you hear me? .....probably not. I'm pretty far from .....anyone.

BUT

I'm having a blast! I love it here, I'm in Huntington residence, and everyone here is amazing, our chants own the campus, and last night we were officially welcomed by all the seniors.

I've started calling this place home, which is really saying something, because it FEELS like home. This right here feels like where I'm supposed to be, and it's an amazingly warm sensation. Last night we had a ritual letting go of all our baggage, so we could start fresh up here, and it was afreeing experience, and together with the new friends I've made, we all hugged and cried and laughed together. It is a true unit here, and far exceeds anything I imagined. Anyway, here are the pictures from my first day, there are MANY more to come. Our rez has gone bowling, go carting, raiding, watched movies, played music, it's all amazing..

Welcome to our room! :O Awesomeness is on the other side

Mickey Mouse (from Disney World), Hamlet from Haliburton, and Jack the Ass from Ireland, 3 stuffed animals from three of the best places on earth. And of course my homemade blanket from Ella <3>
Lantern, and 2 of the world's best people, with me always. <3>

BOOKS BOOKS BOOKS!! the essential movies, cds and books that i require to survive. As well as over 9000 pounds of textbooks :

My ohsoOrganised desk. It looks better now, I promise.

My view from the window, isn't that friggin sweet?

MY BED!!!! it's like 3 feet off the ground and I adore it, even though I wake up with back pains every single day ;)

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...THE WALL OF EPICNESS! everyone important to me is on that wall somewhere or somehow, be it Ales with the post cards, D-Rail through lyrics, or Sam through photos, you're all here with me

And Erin, of course, made SURE I can't do much without remembering that your heart is home. Love you, Kiddo.

That's all for now, I'm off to computer science - essential for being a teacher apparently -_____- but Canadian history pre-confed is AWESOME! So have a great afternoon, I'll be back soon!!

PeaceLoveMusic

Hello Goodbye

2009-09-03T21:33:00.000-07:00

hey guys!

I'm moving in 6 hours!!

holy crap

not much time, I need some sleep....but um, I just thought this verse seemed kinda nice;

"You'll always find your way back home"

Wherever or whatever home happens to be to you. For me, that means to the people who hold my heart. For you it could mean a football feild, or a favourite chair. Whatever it is, you'll find your way back there no matter how far you get from it. My friends may be all over Ontario....and hell the rest of the world, but home is when we're together, for however brief a time.

I'll be posting a blog from Sudbury.

Much love
Stephanie

Life is essentially a countdown

2009-08-28T18:56:00.000-07:00

Hello!!!

I'm at the cottage, preparing to come home!

But only for a day and a half.

You see, I'm down to a 2 day countdown to the.....

JONAS BROTHERS CONCERT IN TORONTO!!!!!! OMG! soooooooooo excited! haha

less than 48 hours to go.

And less than 7 days until I move away.

See, we spend our lives counting down to upcoming events, but they rush up on us so quickly it's scary.

You miss the time in between because it's gone before you get a chance to realise it.

~Stephanie

Love, Pain and the WHOLE CRAZY THING

2009-08-19T14:10:00.000-07:00

Well then,

I've been rather...erm...not myself these past few weeks.

UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR!
I know thats what you're thinking.
I must have been depressing to live with.

Oi....but I couldn;t quite avoid it. At least I got some good music out of it, I mean, how many happy love songs should be permitted in one gallery, am I right? *cough*I have, for the most part, pulled myself back to the Steph my friends are happy with. I was informed by Darryl that I was no longer allowed to be sad....and I mean once D-Rail says something, it gets done. In all seriousness, my best friends have been ...well...the best.

I mean, Sammie, Ryan, Matt,D-Rail, and Matt ...how many friends are willing to stay up to god knows what hour just because I needed a figurative shoulder? Not many.

BUT I DO BELIEVE I'M BACK

who knew running into the person who broke you would magically put you back together, or at least finish the job that you'd started?

Now onto current events.
17 days and I officially move out.
As in 4.5 hours away from home.
To go to university.
To become a teacher.
To start the next chapter of my life.
HOLY TEXTBOOKS BATMAN!I have a fridge, his name is Magestic Bob, and a printer named Alfred. I have hprroble sheets and towels from my gramma - so horrible I felt too sorry for them to take them back. We're now in this together. I also have pots and pans named the Pot Bangers (university group thing).
Two weekends ago my two best friends came up to the cottage for the weekend. I'll put it like this, Ryan survived the cottage and Sam and I survived Ryan. XD we had FUN.Then all last week it felt like I was living with a different friend. Jam session with Matt and Darryl, quality Matt and Steph time on friday - man the stories I could tell XD, I saw Sammie for all too brief (short but brief?!) a time, and Ryan as well. I love you all.Then saturday, a new friend, Daniel, drove me to Cobourg for a day at the beach with a bunch of other Laurentian Freshmen. Turned out that due to reasons unknown, only four of us showed...but we still had a great adventure. lol.

This thursday is a birthday bash like no other, celebrating the natal days/going away of myself and Sam. Love love loveAnd other than that, this is my final week in Courtice, before going back to the cottage.
Then coming home for the JONAS BROTHERS CONCERT!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!11then it's off to a new part of life, where I of course will keep you updated.I apologise for being such a deadbeat lately. Really.I hope you're all enjoying summer.
Peace, Love, Music. Life depends on all three.

I walk out of this darkness
With no sense of regret
And I go with a clear conscience
We both know that you can't say that
Here's to show
For all the time I loved you so
so...
Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend who let you down so
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
Cause what you did was low.
~Kelly Clarkson

Once Upon A Time

2009-08-16T20:41:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time there was a girl
She loved music and hated spiders
And every time the radio plays
Lyrics act as constant reminders

Once upon a time there was a boy
He made the girl take a second glance
At what she thought and what she said
Then he dared her to take a chance

The girl believed in things
In the people who she loved
He had faith in his heavenly Father
Who ruled from Above

She had a way about her
That he could never explain
And for the oddest reasons
His heart stopped when she said his name

Everyone but her saw
The power of her smile
And only he knew how she fit
On his shoulder driving that hundredth mile

She was the girl he made plans with
Years ahead instead of weeks
And she forgave him time after time
For the promises he didn’t keep

He never understood why
When she walked in the room
He’d feel a million years younger
And his heart was in full bloom

She never really noticed
That he used to pay attention
To the little details she’d tell him
Little truths she’d rarely mention

Her head was always in the clouds
Writing lyrics with the wind
And he was too busy building walls
To ever let her in

She always saw things looking up
Dancing in puddles on a rainy day
And he tried to keep in step with her
But felt like he got in the way

She’d drift off to sleep
In the safety of his embrace
While he was weary of tomorrow
And the uncertainties they faced

In a million different ways
She was a million different things
And for the first time in his life
Someone had offered him his wings

Once upon a time there was a girl
She loved poetry and hated clowns
And once upon a time there was a boy
Who was too careless and let her down

(c) 2009

So I am In Fact, Still Here....

2009-07-15T19:43:00.000-07:00

hey folks....
so I've been rather...MIA for a little while....sorry, life kinda got in the way haha.
But I'll be uploading a lot more since I'm on holidays now - finally - and I'll have more to say than "omg If I study any more, I may die" xD
Hope you're all enjoying the rays ;)

ZOO?!?

2009-05-30T18:30:00.000-07:00

So the famjam and I hit the Metro Toronto Zoo today! LOVE IT THERE woo!

that's us ^ minus mom who's behind the camera. I really have no idea what's going on in that photo, but I love it haha.

OMG HIPPO OUT OF WATER! THAT NEVER HAPPENS :

Kangaroo walk....it's sweet, there's no fence between you and the roos :) they're chill, we're chill, therefore we're chillin' together ;)

Bison, Canada exhibit (oddly my second favourite spot haha even though it's my own country)

this is the first time I've ever gotton a picture of her. She's always so elusive...

Mamas running the show.....SURPRISE ;) haha kidding...

The reason I go to the zoo...I call him Red. We've been friends for about....6 years now? Yeah something like that. I spend like nearly an hour here everytime I'm there....love.

Beauty sleeps....

hehehe "I shall call you squishy and you shall be mine"

More of Red the Tree Kangaroo...<3

I really like this one....dunno why

SWAN FAMILY!

HUMAN FAMILY! (funny, we look more out of place...)

Still addicted to flowers hehe

Anyways, it was a SOLID day

now I'm going back to my english essay.....last one of my high school career :O

hope you're well

Stephanie

Now It's Always Once Upon A Time In New York City...

2009-05-24T14:25:00.000-07:00

Once Upon A Time......

A group of kids from a small town in southern ontario venture into the grand cities of New York City and Washington DC.

These students boarded the bus with no idea that it would turn out to be one of the best times of their lives.

The bus departed at 9pm, and arrived in New York at 5am .... running on 2 hours of less of sleep, the travellers went into the wafty and greasy yet welcoming mcdonalds.

Shortly after, they waved goodbye to their bus for the day and headed down 5th avenue, to tackle NYC in one day, then DC in the next 4. This is the fairytale in photos.

this is the washington monument - it is SO tall :

us at the park, looking at the Statue of Liberty... :)

this is us. Aaron, Nik, Me [Stephanie], Ryan, and Matt. Together, we took on the city! History and politics nerds for life <3

the three musketeers on their first night in DC

Vietnam memorial. this statue was amazing

washington
at

night

unbelievable O__O

this place's history is UNREAL. omg, we got to eat dinner there : my mind was blown

Lady Liberty!

the gang minus matt (i think he was taking the shot)

all for one....

Ellis Island.....it was amazing. Go there. That's all I can say.

"NYC! THE SHIMMER OF TIMES SQUARE!" the beauty of this part of the city was stunning. I would go back just to see that at night once again

I've always wanted to see that....now I have ^_^

so in nyc the buildings reach the sky......

OUR GROUP AT THE UN! PEACE!!

I LOVED the fire escapes... I took about 5o pictures of them

this photo is essentially all of us in our truest form....

Canadians resting after a long day at the smithsonian.... <3

YES WE CAN?!

everyone but me was so full they were nearly sick ..... one of the perks of being diabetic I guess ;)

Meeting a Canadian Ambassitor

Every day I wish I was back there. The memories we made will forever last, and in case any of you read this.... "For hard times!" ;)

Now it's always once upon a time

In New York City

It's a big old, bad old, tough old town, it's true

But beginnings are contagious there

They're always setting stages there

They're always turning pages there for you

Ain't it great the way it all beginsin New York City?

Right away you're making time and making friends

No one cares where you were yesterday

If they pick you out you're on your way

To a once upon a time that never ends

~huey lewis

THE NIGHT OF NIGHTS <3

2009-04-26T12:41:00.000-07:00

It's gonna be a night TO REMEMBER!

Oh it was.

The Starlit Soiree, Holy Trinity's Prom 2009, on April 24th, was a hit.

I miss it already. I don't really have words to describe the evening,

so I'll let the photos talk for themselves.

It was a night which reminded me of all the times we've shared. I've had the time of my life with you guys <3

so why don't you meet me

down behind our old school

we'll waste away the weekend

with perfect regard for how cavalere we used to be

that beautiful insanity

the apathy surrounding me

don't close your eyes or we'll fade

Away..

(Hedley, Old School)

Something I've Been Thinking About (Involuntarily)

2009-01-27T09:07:00.000-08:00

"can two walk together, unless they are agreed?" (amos 3:3)

So my friend told me this yesterday, and generally, when he throws bible quotes at me, i ignore them, but this one actually caught my interest (and it hurts admitting it).

Ever since he sent it, its been driving me crazy. Like, I've been thinking more about it than my exams @_@

I have NO idea why, but it's made me think (damn you, Nik!). Can two people be together unless they agree? I'd like to think so. But then the lingering question; if they CAN be, is there something missing? -__-

It all made me think about my religious class where my teacher told me that relationships have less of a chance of surviving when the two people aren't of the same faith. That doesn't seem right though, I mean, my parents are different faiths and they've been married for 25 years.

Maybe it just means more arguments? O_o

I personally think that 2 people of opposing beliefs can have a strong relationship so long as they're on the the same page about other things. If you love each other, can't everything else be dealt with? Am I being romantic and naive?

What do you think?

I'm overthinking it obviously, but its more entertaining than studying. :) Who'd have thought an atheist would like a bible quote? Guess there's truth in fiction after all ;)

I Wanna Break Every Clock

2009-01-18T08:20:00.001-08:00

I don't wanna study anymore :(

17 Forever

2008-12-13T06:27:00.000-08:00

So I think I'm turning into a sentimental slob.

No.

I'm not kidding.

Stop smirking. Or continue on, I don't care.

It's true.

This year...I don't know, but my friends and I have all of a sudden become like, a unit. It's crazy, because before we were always like, yeah friends = important. Now, friends = essential.

These kids, some of whom i've known since before I could walk, and others whom have just recently come into my life, are a major reason I'm where I am today and why I am who I am.

It's crazy, because we haven't had an easy 4 years. Together, we've lost friends and family members, family disasters, illnesses, loves and lost loves, and yet, we're still here. A unit. Stronger, perhaps, because of all we've gone through together.

I heard this song on the radio, and it just made me think about how lucky I am, and how lucky we all are to have each other...

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight
ooh ooh ooh oohooh ooh ooh ooh

Will you remember me
You ask me as I leave
Remember what I said
Oh how could I, oh how could I forget

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight

We're one mistake from being together
But let's not ask why it's not right
You won't be seventeen forever
And we can get away with this tonight
Metro Station - 17 Forever

Sam, Ales, Eric, Billy, Ryan, Carolyn, Steph, Chris, Kevin, Alex, Alex, Kelsey, Dylan, Steph, Maddie, Matt, Matt, Matt, Matt, Nic, Nik, Nick, Jess, Jeremy, Sam, Dom, David, Bailey, Ariana, Rebecca, Amy, Taylor, Jermaine, Sammy, Amanda, and Kate, it doesn't matter if I've known you 13 years or 13 days, you've touched my life in the best of ways, and I love you for it.

Listen!

We've got a situation

They're always putting us down

We are the generation

Can't keep us underground

Is it my imagination

Or do you feel good?

We're on a one way mission

We can take it or die

We are the sunshine nation

Cause of the satellites

Is it my imagination

Or do you feel good?

What a day, What a day, What a day

What a day, What a day, What a dayWhat a day,

What a day, What a dayWhat a day, these are the days

Running the world

It's the time of our lives

And baby we wont ever die

cos we're the young we're alright

We've gotta stop this feeling

Cos i don't wanna live twice

we better start believing

before we run out of time

Is it my imagination

Or do you feel good?

What a day, What a day, What a day

What a day, these are the days

Running the worldIt's the time of our lives

And baby we wont ever die

cos we're the young we're alright

alright, hey

Running the world

It's the time of our lives

And baby we wont ever die

Fight till we fallStanding tall

Cos time is on our side

Cos we're the young we're alright

yeah we're alright

Is it my imagination (No!)

We're the young we're alright

~McFly - we are the young

Love, Actually

2008-11-30T15:10:00.000-08:00

Now before you skip this because it looks cheesy, hear me out for a second.

Still here?

Excellent. =)

"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspision love actually is, all around"

This is from a movie called Love Actually. Forget the film though, for a minute, and just take in the words.

Love is, when you take a minute to think about it, the most powerful of all emotions. It is something that becomes pertinent to our lives, something people strive to find, people give things up to keep it, and people die defending it.

If love wasn't so powerful, why would someone say "I'd die for you"? If love wasn't worth risking everything for, why do people give up comfort of familiarity in hopes for it? If the kind of love you hear about in stories wasn't possible, how can so many people write about it? If love wasn't so important, why do people without it feel empty?

I'm not saying the world could be complete with only that, but with love, what can't you achieve? Anything is attainable when you're loved, and nothing can't be figured out.

People say Love's just a cliché, but I beg to disagree. How can a four letter word that can literally change people's lives ever be a true cliché? Sure people can say it without meaning it (we've all heard that) but that doesn't make the feeling or word cheap, it just makes the person saying it lightly look like a fool.

I ask you, how many other words can make you feel as many things on the emotion spectrum as Love can? How many emotions can make you feel incandesently happy and tooth-rattling scared all at the same time? How many other things do you hope to find just once in your life? Once in your life is all people think it will take to fill their heart forever....must be a satisfying feeling.

True love can't ever die, so long as people remember how important it is, because it's something timeless, ageless, and unforgettable.

I won't go on forever, because I shouldn't have to, but just think...

Love is not old fashioned, but something that never goes out of style

These pictures are just an idea of what love is, for me.

November Is Diabetes Month

2008-11-19T17:18:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone.

So yes, as the title states, this is the one month a year dedicated to something very close to my heart - Type One Diabetes.

For those of you that don't know, Type 1 Diabetes is an autoimmune disease that basically stops your pancreas from creating insulin for your body. So far, this disease has no cure, and those of us who get diagnosed, become insulin dependant for life. It's still in the top 5 killers in canada, behind only heart disease , heart attacks, and cancer.

It's also one of the poorly understood of those 4 things.

Type One Diabetes. Let's talk about it.

I got diagnosed with it in 2005, the september I went into grade 9. I'd lost over 30 pounds in 5 short weeks, became thirsty to the point it was scary, and I started blacking out and not being able to see.

I found out my blood sugar was 39.9 (and it's supposed to be 5-7). So I was admitted into the hospital, and my new life started.

I learned how to survive on needles, and how not to be afraid at the sight of blood. I learned that things had to be counted and measured, and that my blood sugar level really decided how i felt.

I hated it.

What had I done to deserve to have my childhood taken away like that? Why could I no longer simply have a Coke or Juice from the fridge whenever I wanted? What would my friends think?

Turns out, my friends were amazing. My story is rather simple. I dealt with the obstacles because it was either that or die - and I chose survival. I live a healthy life because I enjoy it. I met my best friends because of it, and I'm a published writer today thanks to it as well. I'm not going to say it was undying inner strength that kept me going - that would be a bunch of bs. No, I'm the first person to admit that my friends SAVED ME. No doubt about it. And they're the ones that keep me breathing today. Without them, I would have become a diabetes stat, there's no doubt in my mind whatsoever. They accept and love me for who I am - I say who because the disease is a huge part of ME as a person today - and I could never want or hope for more than that. Up until I got into the hospital, I never knew just how much my friends loved me, and now it's something that I never have to even question. They're behind me 200% and in knowing that, there's nothing I can't get over. I don't care how cheesy it sounds- my friends saved my life, and thats all there is to say.

Now, onto the ignorance, somethingthat is a HUGE problem...

Too many people assume that type one is the same as type 2 - when really, the two should not even be classified as similar diseases. I'll put it really bluntly and simply: Type Ones are born with a gene, and at some point in their life, something triggers it into effect, and it in turn stops the production of insulin in your pancreas. TYPE TWOS are people who led a poor lifestyle, and their pancreases literally get tired and slow down. They don't always completely stop working, and that's why many type 2's don't ever become insulin dependent the way we do. Umm, some FAQs: No we weren't nessessarily fat before we got diagnosed, no it's not contagious, no we're not ALLERGIC TO SUGAR.

Yes needles hurt, yes 7 a day sucks, no I don't eat a lot, and yes, I'm happy living as a diabetic, even when times are hard....

I can't really pick it apart any more, any questions/comments/stories are welcomed <3

Sock Love

2008-11-13T18:10:00.000-08:00

So this blog is going to be rant-free, agnst-free, and politics-free.

Today I'd like to write about socks.

But not just any socks.

My socks. And my friend's socks.

You see, a few weeks ago, my best friend came up to me with a delima. She needed to make a book, and her topic was socks. But she needed a model. She thought my legs would be just right, so she asked if she could borrow them. Being the friend I am, I said, why of course! So I lent my legs and photography interest to her for the afternoon. Between the two of us, we took over 250 pictures, and tried on more than 20 pairs of socks. Here's what happened:

Socks are amazing. They can easily express so much without you having to say a word.

Sam and I have the most fun in the world just doing things like this together. We've both got creative minds (hers is far more brilliant than mine) so putting them together often has spectacular results!

Well, I hope you enjoyed these, check out her work, you will not be wasting your time!

www.padfootsmyhero.deviantart.com

Lest We Forget

2008-11-11T12:56:00.000-08:00

Today is - arguably - the most important day in our nation's calendar. I don't really care where you stand on war and peace. You could be a hippie, way out in left field, saying love your brother etc, OR you you could be 100% for the idea of the war and believe fully in what people are doing. Hell, you could be in the middle, not really having an opinion either way.

The reality is, those opinions are completely irrelevant today. Remembrance Day. The ONLY day we set aside to give thanks to the men and women who laid down their lives for us then, and to those who are willing to do so today. On this day, 90 years ago, the guns fell silent over europe, leaving over 60 000 casualties, and thousands more wounded for life. The War that was only to last 6 months lasted four years, and it certainly wasn't the war to end all wars.

Rather, it paved the way for deeper hatreds and fierce enemies, which would cause further outbreaks in the years to come. A world that had once been generally peaceful for 100 years (the last major conflict being the French Revolution which ended in 1814), was to become a major ground of bloodlust and hatred.

In the years to come, Canada alone participated in WWI and WWII, the Korean War, various UN and NATO missions, and currently Afghanistan.

Behind these battles are men and women.

Men and women.

These men and women who are behind these acts of courage are doing it for one reason: Us.

They're not doing it for the paycheck, they're not doing it for kicks, and they're not doing it for themselves. They're doing it right now for the same reasons they've been fighting for 90 years. To protect our freedom which we've constantly taken for granted.

So now I ask you. Who stands behind these men and women who are behind these battles? We do.

WE DO.

For all these men and women are willing to sacrifice - and they're giving us their lives, here - the very LEAST we can do is support them. That's what this day's all about. Remembering the people we lost - and yes I say lost, because they impacted us to the point that we feel it when we lose one of them - and keeping in mind the people we didn't.

It KILLS me that today during our ceremony there were teens talking. Honestly. HOW DISRESPECTFUL CAN YOU POSSIBLY GET?! You wanna talk while I'm reading, knock yourself out, but when a slideshow is going dedicated to the 97 men and women who GAVE THEIR LIVES, so some frigging respect. These kids were my age and younger, and i was embarrassed by them. Grow up.

Another thing that my generation seems to have an issue with is poppies. It's really a simple process. You wear one. Not that hard. But apparently it is....it's mindboggling.

The lack of understanding is nearly suffocating. It's like a huge chunk of young people just closed their ears during history class and refuse to care. I do not understand how so many people are so clueless. Where is our country going to be in 10 years? 20? 30?

The message of this is simple:

Support our men and women regardless of whether or not you support the war. They're fighting for us, so we should fight for them.

Don't let November 11th be the only day you set aside to show our troops (past and present) how vital they are to are nation as we live in it today. Just because you can't see the war outside your window, doesn't mean it isn't happening. Shutting your eyes doesn't stop it from happening. So open them up and show your support, damnit! They deserve it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eewXEOfuIsQ here's some canadian footage from the first world war, check it out. (to throw some family history in here, my great grandpa faught and was wounded in this battle. he was left for dead in a foxhole for 3 days, where he finally escaped, and was shipped home. )

Passchendaele

2008-11-08T08:29:00.000-08:00

Well...

Wow.

I saw the movie last night, and I can honestly say it's the most powerful movie I've ever seen.

There are no words which can describe the effect it had on me. Not only did it FINALLY tell the story of Canadian bravery, but it told our story through blunt and unabashed honesty. It showed that some things really have no real reason. Like the 600 000 casualties in that battle alone, only to have it taken back in less than a week.

I think now, more than ever, people need to watch this. Too many kids - and even adults - don't understand the depths of hell that boys were privy to.

It amazes me everyday how little people care about our troops, our vets, our HISTORY anymore. For example, the campaign I'm running, I almost wish I could show parts of movies like this to open people's eyes. They see war as something to be won on tv screen, or as something foreign and untouchable. The thing is, the war's right here. Just in my toen alone, we have 11 men and women overseas, and who's to say they're all coming home?

This film left me speechless at the end - left the entire theatre in a state of shock, to the point where no one moved until the credits were nearly over. Paul Gross was brilliant, and I don't think that anyone has an excuse NOT to see this movie. The real fottage at the end....the real statistics....This was not some romance movie! It was the most powerful film I've ever seen, and it's documenting one of the battles easily forgotten in our history. I beg you to watch it, because there's nothing like it.

Stephanie.

oh, here's my latest song, it's themed after this film, so enjoy:

The Paper

To my dearest
Won't you come home to me?
I watched you walk aboard the boat
With boots too big for your feet

I haven't seen you since march
It was the twenty third
Since then I've not heard a sound
There's been no word

chorus:
Every day I read the paper
Watch the list of names grow
Still your name's not been added
To a stone placed in a row

You promised you'd come home to me
And that's all I clung to
I don't want a hero
I just need you

They said we've won a ridge
That's yet to be taken
Few miles of dirt and mud
At the price of lives forsaken

I heard you were there
And all of you are heroes
But how many turned to angels
Now at rest in rows?

(chorus)

Today I got a letter
Said you'd be coming back
Injured in the depths of hell
But your spirit didn't crack

Said "darling, I'm sorry
I wrote every day it's true
But the things that I saw
Made it hard to say I love you"

chorus:
Everyday I read the paper
Watch the list of names grow
Picture all the loves lost
Who are never coming home

You'll always be a hero
That's something I know
By coming home, and standing
By the men lying in rows

...to our men lying in rows

*To the men and women who gave their lives for ours, I can never thank you enough

Moving Here

2008-11-07T12:29:00.000-08:00

Hey Everyone!!

Well, I've officially moved here from photoblog.com, because I'm having problems with it at this moment in time communicating with a few friends :D

Soooo
This week was very interesting to say the least.
This was the first official few days of the Campaign: MISSION Christmas in Afghanistan.
It's year three of this project, and it's sort of ironic, because the first year I started it, which was 3 years ago, I said to the students "well, hopefully this will be their last year there"

So much for that.

The campaign is designed to boost the morale of the soldiers by sending Christmas cards, letters, poems, etc, from our school as a thank you.

I don't really support the war, but, I do support our troops, and I think that's the main thing with this project, you know?

This war has gone on wayyyy long enough for my taste, and like, seriously, if the US is pulling out, isn't that our hint that we should have been gone like, years ago?

Also,
OBAMA!! Sorry, but that's freaking awesome! I'm so happy for the states, but then my faith in humanity dropped into the negatives. Prop 8 got voted in! Like WTF! Sorry, but how could they POSSIBLEY do this? If the new gov't doesn't try to squash it......>_< faith = gone.

Gah, anyways, I don't have a whole lot of interesting things to say, besides HT made school history today in football, I have to get 96% at least on my history test on monday, and I'm going to the movies.

Much love
Stephanie